Archive for Self Improvement – Page 5

Detoxify… Your Mind

05/06/13 Monika Comments (0)

Do you ever feel scattered and overwhelmed?  Do you pray for focus to help you be more productive and less exhausted at the end of the day?  Do you strive for that feeling of accomplishment with a satisfying moment so you can kick back and enjoy the feeling of a job well done?  At that moment you may feel a little tired but you aren’t exhausted.  You know that exhaustion that I’m talking about when even getting off the couch to go to your comfortable and welcoming bed is too much.  Surely you deserve a good night’s sleep – don’t you?

So how can you enjoy the pleasure of a job well done?  The magic word –FOCUS.  Yes, we live in an ADD world – distractions are paramount.  You actually need to develop the muscle to help create a clear, unadultereated focus if you are ever going to feel a sense of peace.

Lately I have been giving many of my clients the job of  “detoxifying their minds”.  Yes that’s right!  Getting everything out of your head and onto paper.  All the shoulds, wants, failures, disapointments.  All of it!  Put it right before your eyes to look at and face and then eliminate.  This simple process not only cleanses the mind but also makes you feel a lot lighter.   All you have to do is give yourself a ½ hour or so to start and then write – no edits – preferably handwritten, too.  Allow yourself to be uncensored.  The constant barrage of a continuous, unproductive loop of thoughts can drive us batty.  It’s hard to create something new – new habits, patterns or thoughts -when our brain won’t stop re-treading the old worn-out pathway.

Now you have the opportunity to shed and then re-start – to create a New Story – A New Vision for yourself.  As I heard the other day – “get out of the box so you can read the instructions”.  Let yourself go.

Here are 4 more Tips on How to Detoxify Your Mind and Life:

#1 – De-Clutter.   Too early for spring cleaning?  Well not really.  The cleaner, clearer and more organized your environment is the better you will feel.  Your spirits will improve and so will your self esteem.  The recent interest in the ancient art of placement called  Feng Shu gives us the delightful tools of  how to make our enviroment more beneficial and harmonious.   From color, to texture, to size of a piece of furniture – it all has an impact on your wellbeing.  Stuck energy – whether mental or physical, may very well be caused by improper placement of certain things in key areas in your home, office or yard.  There are many books available on the subject if you want to learn more.

#2 – Get Support.   Everyone needs help.  If you have braved through endless hours of working on a project, going shopping for groceries, then making dinner, then the laundry, then back to the drawing board to finish your project way past midnight – you know what I’m talking about.   If you find yourself working these kinds double or triple shifts at work and home –enroll your family.  You know if you go around with this air of competence they’ll never know you need help.  There is nothing wrong with you if you ask others to chip in.  The secret is people love to contribute  and feel a part of something.  By your slowing down and saving your precious energy (and sanity) – others will step up to the plate and often do more (and a better) job than you could have imagined.  You do not need to do everything all by yourself.  Ask yourself – who is on your team?

#3 – Speak up.   Ask for what you want and need.  You may not feel comfortable doing this at first – but it’s like flexing a new muscle – you will get better over time.  Declaring your wants proudly – first to yourself and then to others – is a sheer sign that you are taking good care of yourself.  You are learning how to take a stand for yourself.  And don’t think about this tactic as being a selfish one – far from the truth.    Remember the basic instructions on a plane – you are the one who always gets the life vest 1st .  You will be detoxifying yourself of the worn out idea that everyone’s priorities are more important than yours – throw that one out the window – quickly!  You are important and you count.

#4 – Relinquish It.   When it comes to your physical space – if you don’t plan to make a Vision Board Collage with that stack of magazines in the corner – get rid of them.  And don’t fool yourself into thinking that you may actually have time to read them someday – just get rid of them.  Or – how about your closet – well if this is too daunting hire a qualified De-Cluttering Genius or an Expert Image Consultant. They love their work and will help you become more objective about the things you can and can’t live without.  This also goes for your kitchen.  Eliminate all the sugar – yes all of it – you can do it!  Because it’s not good for anyone, don’t try and convince yourself to keep it around because someone in your household loves it.  Remember it’s not an ingredient that’s beneficial to anyone’s health.

Comments (0)
Categories : Self Improvement, Wellness
Tags : , , ,

Don’t Gain it Back

05/03/13 Monika Comments (0)

We have all seen many celebrities have problems with their weight – needing to stay in the greatest of shape and then just not being able to sustain it. Right before our eyes, on public display, they bare their souls about their struggles.  Many of us can identify and try as we might, this challenge becomes more and more daunting and difficult to conquer.

Here are five tips on how you can get it and keep it off.  Being able to wear your wardrobe easily – year after year. Let’s get you back into your Skinny Jeans and keep you there. Talk about true freedom!

Tip #1: Stay connected to the qualified professional who helped you lose the weight in the first place. It’s so important to have a strategy and surround yourself with the people who helped you become successful before. Let me be honest – it’s hard to sustain your good eating, exercise, and self care habits on your own. It just is!

We are constantly exposed to triggers in our environment that easily take us off track and distract us from taking care of ourselves. It’s important to have someone who can help you stay empowered, inspired, and successful for the long run.

Tip #2: Take things OFF your plate. This is especially true for you women reading or hearing this today. We women tend to overdo things and we feel virtuous and seemingly “guilt-free” by saying YES to everything and everyone. I encourage you to stop this habit as soon as possible. I have found the most successful people in my programs are those focused more on their wants and needs first, before focusing on what everyone else wants and needs – either in their personal or professional lives.

What happens is that when you are taking care of yourself, a miracle happens. Everyone else seems to be doing just fine and maybe even getting healthier as well. As you start to take better care of yourself, those close to you actually become inspired and start doing the same. Now there’s no guarantee this will happen; however, surprisingly, I see this happen a lot. So stop doing for everyone else, fixing everyone else’s problems, and start focusing on you. You owe it to yourself. Unless you are dealing with young children or elderly parents, everyone else can take care of themselves more than you think they can. Believe me, I see this happen everyday.

Tip #3: Make sure you reward yourself with things other than food or alcohol.  There are so many other, non-caloric, ways to give yourself a gift of appreciation for a job well done, or for something you’ve accomplished, a massage, a new scarf, a new belt, new piece of jewelry, going for a walk on the beach, a concert, a belly dancing class-why not?

I just started ballroom dancing myself, again (I tried it a couple of years ago). Even though I’d always taken dance classes most of my life, ballet, modern, jazz, and most recently hip-hop, which I loved (and didn’t think I would).  I thought I’d add some “new steps” to my repertoire. You know, learning a new activity is not only good for your waistline, but also for your mind and your confidence. So go ahead, give yourself a healthy reward. It’ll be satisfying in so many more ways than eating a bag of M&M’s.

Tip #4: Eat real, whole, and fresh foods as much as possible. They are loaded with the stuff you need and won’t leave you starving or feeling deprived because they are providing the nutrients you need to stay slim and healthy. I have never been a big fan of packaged, processed, or altered foods. There is not much to these bagged, boxed, and artificial foods, which I sometimes refer to as just “good tasting cardboard”, with the “good tasting” component being questionable of course.

The closer a food is to its natural state or as I always say, “closer to mother nature,” the better it is for you. You can’t derive much fuel for your mind and body from empty calories. Even if a whole food appears to have more calories like a sirloin steak, in comparison to a box of crackers you will always be further ahead with the real food versus the packaged one.

Consider staying away from packaged “diet foods” as eating these types of foods actually prevents you from learning how to cook healthy foods.  Often these pre-packaged foods are loaded with sodium and other additives. So think healthy, not necessarily quick fix.

Tip #5: Move. You need to move. There’s no getting around this. Find something that doesn’t feel like work but is loads of fun. As I just did with the ballroom dancing. Yes, that’s right – exercise can be fun (just like eating well can also be fun). Make a point of doing something everyday, even if just for 10 minutes.

You need to make this a habit. It’s good for your brain to help with stress reduction by taking a simple break in your day. Have things around that trigger you to move like the weights or pictures of you doing yoga. That is what I have on my Vision Board, which I get to look at every day. I also have a recumbent bike, free weights, ball and bands at home, and a beautiful neighborhood to take walks in if I choose to. Don’t just plan to go to the gym someday, take the first step and then stick with it. And also mix it up a bit. Don’t always do the same thing everyday. Try something new, so you can work different muscle groups and keep it interesting.

These are the tips that will keep you from heading down the same path that some famous people have gone down. Do these and you will always be in great shape-mind, body, and spirit!

Comments (0)
Categories : Diet, Self Improvement, Skinny Jeans, Wellness
Tags : , , , , , , ,

Discovering Your Gifts

04/26/13 Monika Comments (0)

I grew up in a robust and lively household.  There was NEVER a dull moment!  With a family of 10 (8 siblings and my parents) there was a lot going on all the time.  Recently I have been reviewing my childhood and finding out what talents I accrued from my early days.  Even though peace and quiet was not something I had in my childhood home, I certainly developed abilities necessary to thrive in a hectic environment.  First my ability to handle many people and things at once was clearly established.  My ability to tap into others needs and concerns helped me be more adaptable and sensitive to others.  Also, considering I was the youngest in the brood, I learned how to stand up for myself and fight for wrongs incurred against myself and others.  I suppose speaking up for myself has given me my ability to feel somewhat at ease with public speaking (known to be the number one fear most people have).  I could also say that being the youngest almost forced me to make my voice bigger and more unique.

Have you found your voice?  What are the unique gifts you have developed or even forgotten from your childhood?

Here are 3 Tips on Discovering (or Re-discovering) Your Gifts:

Tip #1  Your Environment.  What was your environment like?  Was it chaotic, peaceful and serene, or was it active, exciting and never a dull moment just like mine?  Whatever it was like you may gain some clues about the type of environment you thrive best in.  However, you may find yourself choosing something exactly opposite of what you’re used to.   Having a busy childhood – now you’ve chosen not to have children or you were an only child and now you’ve chosen a house full of offspring.  Whatever the choice I wonder if you find yourself anxious or unable to relax?  Regardless of your environment – an inability to really relax is a common phenomenon of our culture.  We are so conditioned to be craving an adrenaline rush whether it’s by having a jam packed schedule, using food for excitement and entertainment, becoming addicted to Facebook – you fill in the blanks.

Most of us don’t know how to relax. Learning this skill, regardless of how you were raised, is essential if you want to have a healthy and balanced life.  The 1st step is to allow yourself to do nothing – yes, you read that right!  Stay quiet – no TV, no books, no knitting – just close your eyes fo 5-10 minutes and let your thoughts just drift from one thought to the next.  The longer you do this the more you’ll find your thoughts begin to disappear leaving you feeling calmer and more rejuvenated.  After your “Mind Relaxation” exercise, you might want to journal about any discoveries or clarity you may found during this process.

Tip #2  Getting Along. How did your Parents behave with each other and with your siblings?  Was it the same for everyone?  Did they have time for you?  It’s funny, I often hear that only children got a lot of attention and yet spent a lot of time alone – a possible contradiction.  It’s really hard to have much time on your own with siblings around, but an ability to create quiet time – a time to re-center –  can be developed.  I have found that when you spend all your time making sure everyone else is taken care of and always busying ourselves with others concerns – we usually forget what we really need.

It’s vital that you cultivate “quiet time” in your day or at the very least sometime in your week.  Rushing around here and there only increases your stress hormones, creates unhealthy habits, bad food choices and disturbed sleep among other things.  You end up “feeling ragged and worn-out” – not the desirable results when you would rather be feeling productive and  focused.  It’s difficult to do anything when exhausted and stressed out. So getting along with yourself first is optimal, and the only way to do that is by taking the time to get to know yourself better.  What makes you tick, what are your likes and dislikes, what are you drawn to?  The more you get along with and know yourself – the better you are at getting along with others.  Doing things for the right reasons – not to people please by continuously compromising on your goals or even your values is not the best way to live.

Tip #3  Did you feel nurtured?  This may not be easy to assess now that we are adults.  Our perceptions of feeling nurtured in our childhood may be a little skewed.  I find, in general, one of the most difficult skills to develop is self nurturing.  Most of us don’t really know how to do this successfully. Although pleasant experiences like going to the spa, going shopping, going out for lunch with a friend is really not what I’m talking about here. I have often seen frantic women rush to their spa destination as if it’s just another thing to do – another job.  They are thinking – “Let’s get this done and take it off our list – it’s supposed to help me relax – right?” This attitude kind of defeats the purpose – doesn’t it?

My mission here is to help you learn how to slow down a little and maybe sacrifice the spa and opt for creating a spa-like sanctuary right where you are – in your very own home without noise, brain clutter, distractions or other people’s agendas. In doing so – you’ll choose better foods to enjoy and eat in a more relaxed and digestively supportive way.  Giving your body not only the nutrients – healthy foods – it needs, but also helping those nutrients go to the right places in your body, giving you the most bang for your buck is the key. You see eating isn’t just about the food, it’s about the atmosphere and state you are in before, during and after eating.  It’s an art really.  The Art of Eating is one of the Arts of Feeling Nurtured so relax and enjoy…

Book to read:  The Solution by Lucinda Bassett will help you dig further.

Comments (0)
Categories : Self Improvement, Wellness
Tags : , ,

What is a WICO Score Anyway?

04/24/13 Monika Comments (0)

So many of you have been asking what a WICO Score actually is.  I’ve determined that if you have a high WICO score there is a good likelihood you will have a high FICO Score – what everyone wants right?  If you’re healthy and taking good care of yourself, you are likely to be more productive and successful, hence a high FICO Score.

Your WICO Score is determined by assessing specific health markers and underlying factors that make up your Wellness Index.  By taking an online test you will know how your digestion, thyroid, blood sugar or cardio vascular system, among other things, is scoring.  There are 15 areas of wellness that can be evaluated.  There’s a saying “you can’t change what you can’t measure.”  So taking stock, just as you would your credit reports and FICO scores, will give you a clue as to how you’re doing.

I know you want to be as healthy as possible, that’s why you are a valued reader of the Coaching For Health Ezine.  By taking steps now you can enhance your WICO Score and your wellbeing.

So how can you get the best WICO Score?

Here are 3 Secrets:

Secret #1  Keep Checking:  Just because you once were healthy doesn’t necessarily mean you still are today.  Check in with your body.  I often say when working with a client – “we are building a communication partnership between you, me and your body’s inherent wisdom”.  Learning to hear what your body is actually saying requires patience, practice and stillness.  Give yourself the time – evenings, weekends or mornings where you can check in with your inner voice and your body’s wisdom.

Secret # 2  Forget Perfection:  Give up the idea of perfection when it comes to your health and your life.  Perfection is a near impossible state to attempt striving for.  You can’t get there.  What’s ironic is that the more you try to be perfect the less “perfect” you become.  Perfection is often tied to people pleasing – a no win situation by all accounts.  Ultimately the only one you need to please is yourself – which could mean spending a day on the weekend in your pajamas. Unheard of you say?

Try it some time – you might like it.  Let’s face it, you most likely spend the entire week giving of yourself endlessly.  Why not give yourself the sweet gift of R&R on the weekend?  So maybe staying in your pj’s all day won’t be your thing but maybe something else will be.  Try something you actually would like to do – and remember to suspend all judgment or guilt while doing it.  Enjoy the quiet for a change.

Secret #3  Studies Show…  Nearly everyone knows that being who you are and feeling comfortable in your own skin is essential for your overall health.  Countless studies have shown the more integrated you are and tuned into your true self the healthier you will be.

In her awe-inspiring novel “Dying to Be Me” Anita Moorjani had to nearly pass on to finally get in touch with her true nature.  Ridden with end stage Lymphoma, Anita went through a

death defying and life altering miraculous recovery and came to know that unconditional love for ourself and others is the MOST necessary medicine for life.

Comments (0)
Categories : Self Improvement, Wellness
Tags : , ,

What’s Your Inner Size?

04/22/13 Monika Comments (0)

When my friends were visiting a few weeks ago we found ourselves perusing shops at L.A. and California Fashion Marts (we went twice it was so much fun!) I wondered what size we all were?  What size was I before and what size do I want to be?  I got to thinking, isn’t your outer size usually a reflection of what’s going on inside of you?  If you’re calm, feel supported and taking good care of yourself then you ought to be the right size – right?

You are often so consumed with your size aren’t you? Aren’t we as a culture? Do things fit or not?  You are often aghast when you try on that pair of pants you bought only last year and suddenly they are now feeling r-e-a-l-l-y   s-n-u-g!  Yikes – what happened?  Where did you go wrong?  Are your only fooling yourself with your disbelief ? Certainly you know what you did or didn’t do to get this result – don’t you?  OK – well maybe you forgot to exercise (a few times), oh and yes you completely forgot to have smaller servings, you perhaps doubted that too much wheat, in the form of pasta and bread could actually be a culprit…after all didn’t all of your ancestors perpetually eat this food and never gain an inch!  Quick note here – the grains of our forefathers were actually much better for you – they were filled with more nutrients from the rich, fertile non-ravaged soil, they were not highly processed, they didn’t need to be shipped from as far away as China (just kidding not sure if we import wheat – more like rice I think) and finally, we didn’t eat as much of it as we do today – it’s in everything.

But hold on, before you drown yourself in a bowl of cheerios, let’s get back to the title of this article “What your Inner Size?” Yes, that’s right – your outer size is dictated by your Inner size – or rather your Inner Life.  Your thoughts, your emotions, your feelings, your beliefs and your fears – everything that’s going on inside of you is affecting your weight, your wellness and how you view your world.  If you are suffering from too much stress – it will most likely be affecting your food choices, amounts and regularity of meals.  You may even forget to eat and that can be worse than eating too often – it will negatively affect your blood sugar and cause other hormone fluctuations.  Even if you’re vacationing and throwing caution to the wind – remember even on vacation you can use some restraint and make good healthy choices.

Your inner size requires a deeper look at not only what you are eating but what’s eating you and how you are coping with the demands of your every day life.  Your inner size actually reflects what your body will look and feel like.  If you are not treating it well because you don’t have the time and feel overwhelmed by making everything else a priority then eventually (sooner than later) – your body may start showing signs of your lack of attention with weight gain, cellulite, lack of muscle tone and heavens … dare we mention sagging.  But what about the things that are not visible as in high cholesterol levels, high blood pressure or digestive distress.  Your overall metabolism, energy level and how well your body functions will be affected if you don’t take care of it every day.

The good news is just by doing a little every day you will have a compound effect.  Try 10 minutes on the treadmill instead of 30 or 60.  You need to build in a habit of success. You will be pleasantly surprised when you start seeing the effects of all your efforts.  You may start seeing results as soon as 30 or 60 days into your new habits.  Don’t quit – keep at it.  Cutting back on the extra servings (even if the food is considered “healthy”), a little exercise daily as I mentioned, getting up 20 minutes earlier or going to bed 30 minutes earlier will all benefit you.  Taking your supplements on a regular basis is a very important part of self care. An easy way to remember to take them is by keeping them on your nightstand, kitchen counter or office drawer.  Keep them in a convenient place so you won’t have any excuses about forgetting.  Mine are on my desk both at home and in my office.  My Calcium/Magnesium, which I take at night, sits on my nightstand, it’s a real simple way for me to remember.  After awhile you feel something’s missing if you miss out on one of your new routines – that’s how you know for sure a good habit has been formed.

Your inner size is a reflection of how you take care of yourself and how you manage your life.  You are worth it – so begin now…

Stay well…

Comments (0)
Categories : Self Improvement, Wellness
Tags : , ,

Are You Afraid of Dieting?

04/12/13 Monika Comments (0)

You might be afraid of dieting – even the word scares most of us.  Why?  Because we feel we will fail.  You may not know this but 90% – 95% of Women’s Self Esteem is based on their body image.  Surprising?   Based on my nearly 20 years in practice I have seen, felt and heard the pain surrounding how we women feel about our bodies.  It can be heartbreaking and yet so real.  It affects everything in our lives.  We care too much or we don’t care enough.  I am not a big advocate for dieting, in general, because most diets are designed to fail and they do not take into account hormonal imbalance, improper sleep habits, stress and emotional eating patterns and physiological effects.  But most importantly they don’t take into account the crucial thing – one crucial thing – our thoughts.

Most of us want the Perfect Body.  So we decide to go on a diet and exercise. We essentially DO a Diet for a few weeks and then give up.  Do you want to know the Real Secret to Weight Loss?  You actually need to Become The Person who has a Perfect Body even before you have it otherwise your efforts will only be temporary…

You must change your thoughts in order to have what you want.  It’s really not the diet that counts, it’s who you have to be to follow the diet.  Millions look for the right diet and then focus on what they have to do rather than who they have to be.  Total new concept for most of us I know. A diet will not help you if you don’t change your thoughts.  That’s where the real work begins. It’s an inside job.

As I have been sharing with many of you lately “Your real work starts only after you lose your desired weight.”  Usually we can lose weight – the real miracle, however, is in keeping it off.  But even before the weight comes off you have to be ready to change on the inside.  When thinking of changing your eating, improving your health and deciding to “diet” you may want to ask some questions.

 6 Revealing Questions You can Ask Yourself before Embarking on a “Diet”:

1) Are you more committed to staying the same or to changing?  This is a tough one because you say you want to change – but do you really?  Are you willing to do what it takes – to stick to it no matter what?  Or will you be led astray the first time you are tempted with the chocolate cake or chips and salsa?  Sometimes it’s not the actual food but the addictive patterns that seem to develop after you take that first bite.

2) Does the pain of having more weight feel normal to you? I find sometimes we are very committed to our story – even though you say you don’t want to have the weight you presently have and feeling uncomfortable with the extra 10 + lbs.  After all what would you have to complain about or beat yourself up about?  I know this is perhaps harsh – these are the deeper questions you need to ask yourself. When you lose weight, as is often the case, you start seeing your life differently and the things that appeared “fine” may not be so fine and they require some changes to be made.  Yet when one thing changes, expect other parts of your life to change – and not too worry it could be for the better and hopefully it is for the better.

3) Are you ready to make a change in your life?  Change can be frightening.  We get so comfortable in our discomfort that we can’t imagine anything different and better.  We tolerate things when we needn’t tolerate them.  It’s a big decision to actually start eating healthy and not relying on whatever happens to be in the fridge, grocery store or drive-through. We go to dinner and feel we must have everything on our plate and oh we must have that divine bread in that heavenly basket which is calling our name.  Why would we want to give this up?  It’s entertainment, social and rewarding.  I can’t live without eating whatever I want you might say to yourself.  But what is the price?  When you stand in front of the mirror feeling hopeless when absolutely NOTHING fits you – are you ready to make a change then?

4) Are you letting distractions sabotage your efforts?  Everything else takes priority – after all who am I you might ask?  Tommy’s baseball game is more important than my silly diet – right?  This work project needs to get done – after all it’s my job and it’s more important than getting to the store and stocking my kitchen with healthy foods. Oh, I’m having guests over this week and they’ll want to go out to dinner every night – I’ll just eat what they eat and not make a fuss.  These are only a few examples of how sabotaging your efforts can de-rail you on an ongoing basis.  There will always be something that comes up – always.

5) Are you wanting to lose weight for you or for someone else?  Does someone in your life let you know they aren’t happy about your present body shape?  They may not come out and say it (although some blatantly do) but you may hear some subtle and even hurtful clues and comments.  The proverbial question (which never should be asked of a man – it’s just so unfair to ask them) “Do I look fat in this?”  Is this really your perception or the observer’s?  It is a no win set up question.  But if someone in your life is making you feel less than because you may have put on a few lbs, make sure that it’s something you want to do and not just people please.  That, again, is a no win situation. People pleasing will never get you what you want in life.

6) Are you unrealistic about your weight loss goals?  I sometimes have clients come in wanting to lose weight quickly or want to be at a healthy weight they were at when they were 19 and now they are 50.   If this is the case, you are just setting yourself up for disappointment.  Setting realistic and healthy goals is a must.  You should never be losing more than 1-3 lbs per week.  If you are it is mostly muscle mass which is very unhealthy.  Yes, certainly the first week you will lose more, and most of that is water weight, but after that stick to a slow and steady weight loss pace. And expect a plateau – that is a natural phenomenon and will easily be remedied by tweaking a few things either in your diet or in your exercise regimen.

7)  Are You 3 Feet From Gold?  This is really about quitting – quitting just before you arrive. Don’t quit – you may be just at the point when you are about to make progress, whether it’s a plateau or you’ve lost all the weight you wanted to.  Again, after the weight comes off the real work begins.  Make sure you have a good maintenance strategy in place.  This is the most vulnerable time after you’ve lost the weight.  You may think you are safe and invincible and start eating “the weight gaining foods” – lots of starches, sugars, etc.  Your portions sizes may start to increase.  Or you may start eating late at night.  These habits are so tricky – they seem to re-enter your life when you least expect them to. So prepare yourself and find a professional support system.

Most important – remember always Honor Your Body and Yourself and treat yourself like Gold.

Are You are 3 feet from your own Gold?  

Don’t Quit. 

Comments (0)
Categories : Diet, Self Improvement
Tags : , , , , , , , ,

Take Off Your Mask

04/08/13 Monika Comments (0)

Do you ever feel like you are wearing a mask?  Hiding a part of yourself you want so very much to show and express – yet you constantly stop yourself from doing so?  You want to be that lean person wearing the Hip and Now Fashions, even a pair of Skinny Jeans may fit the bill. Or how about the clothes you’ve already got?  You want to be fit and trim and have your arms stop waving when you yell out hello to your neighbors across the street.

Or maybe, like me, you want to be more like Diane Keaton in “Something’s Gotta Give” – one of my favorite movies.  I just love Diane’s character Erica’s lifestyle in the movie.  She’s got it all – the beach home, the apartment in the city, a fantastic, successful career, a vibrant social life, a loving family and an ensuring romance brewing and most importantly a great sense of humor.  Sounds ideal doesn’t it?  Well you may say: “only in the movies”…well hold on now – maybe it’s possible to have some of your fantasies come true in real life, too.

We all want meaningful spiritual connection with others that’s a given.  We want the physical body of our dreams, too.  Oh and how about the great relationship thrown in as well.  But what about the roles we already have – the masks we already wear?  Do they perhaps hold some of our dreams as well?   We have the wife mask, the professional mask, the mom mask – giving you the genes you need in order to make the perfect cupcake.  Talk about pressure if don’t have the cupcake genes and you’re a mom!    You probably have more that one mask – we all do.  It’s time to take off the masks that aren’t right for you and stop doing what you think you should and start doing what you’d love to. Irresponsible?  Not really it’s actually very responsible and very honoring to you and everyone in your life.

At the beginning of a new year I always suggest you give yourself time to rest and heal from the last 12 months.  Give yourself the opportunity to discover what you like about your self and your present life.  It’s vital you do so.  It’s when you don’t take the time that things start to fall apart.  You stop taking good care of the important things – like eating well, exercising, getting enough quality sleep and tolerating relationships that may not be all that healthy for you.  When you slow down you get to figure out – often by listening to your gut feelings what’s right and what’s not.  If you are running around too much or trying everything you can to avoid being with yourself you will never re-discover what excites you and makes your heart sing.

Believe it or not your food choices and healthy habits are directly related to the things that really matter in your life like your healthy relationships, healthy professional life, and your ability to express yourself creatively.  You need to be more transparent, more honest with yourself to be fully healthy. When you strip away irrelevant masks (or roles) any health or weight challenges you may have will begin to disappear.  So simply wear the beautiful masks that enhance you and are fun to wear – and wear them confidently.

Comments (0)
Categories : Self Improvement
Tags : ,

Feeling Disconnected?

04/05/13 Monika Comments (0)

You may wonder what feeling disconnected or discontent has to do with weight, nutrition or good health?  Or maybe it’s obvious – when you don’t feel a sense of belonging loneliness or depression can often become your best friend.  Especially for women – feeling connected is essential.  The hormone oxytocin– also called the “love hormone” – increases feelings of love and bonding. This hormone is associated with the ability to maintain healthy interpersonal relationships.

We all want meaningful, healthy and spiritual connections with others but how about having this connection with yourself?  Ignoring your body’s signals is a way of disconnecting.  Not paying attention and eating poorly will eventually take its toll on your body. Do you ignore the whispers of your body or your mind? You can only ignore them for so long and then they are no longer whispers but roaring sirens!

Today there’s an epidemic of symptoms of fatigue, anxiety, loss of libido, weight gain, unexplainable aches and pains, sleepless nights and on and on…. These imbalances signal a deep disconnection to not only your body but to yourself.

Do you sometimes feel disconnected from who you are?  Sure you play the roles you have pretty well – but what about you – that YOU deep within.  I have written in the past about Your Inner Size reflecting your Outer Size.  What’s going on inside will eventually show up on the outside – good or not so good.  You can only get away with eating doughnuts, candy bars and french fries for so long and then this behavior finally causes you to not only feel physically tapped out but spiritually as well. Or maybe it’s not even the bad food choices you are making but rather it’s the portion sizes or the times you eat, eating too often or not often enough, starting and stopping diets or exercise.  Losing then gaining then losing then gaining again – you know that one.    By ignoring emotional or physical signs and symptoms you may be just waiting for the Perfect Storm to hit.  Heeding the signs allows you to stop, recognize and begin the process of change. It starts a quest to begin to rediscover what you like about your life.

You must look at the whole picture when it comes to your overall health.  If something physical is going on you need to look deeper.  You need to commit to yourself whole heartedly and take steps to improve your life – Today!  Knowing what makes you tick and what makes you sick is part of getting yourself back. Once you get yourself back – guess what? You get to not only have the healthy, lean body you desire but also a rich connected life.

Nurturing your body takes time and you may need some help to get to where you want to go – to help traverse some of the challenges ahead.  Caring for your mind, heart, and soul require dedication and commitment.  Learning to listen to the whispers of your divine intuition requires patience.  Allow Love, Health and Pleasure to co-exist within you and around you.

When you have a physical symptom – you may want to ask yourself – “what’s the real reason I’m sick?”  “Is something out of balance in my life that I’m afraid to look at?”  It’s time to learn how to write a new prescription for yourself to allow yourself to heal to the core.  Ask yourself “what do I need to make myself healthy?”  And then listen.  The answers are deep within waiting to flow out.  You may need some help along your journey – but it’s a glorious journey.

“In finding yourself you find your place”  Victor Hugo

Comments (0)
Categories : Self Improvement, Wellness
Tags : ,

Are You Ready to Rebuild Your Body?

04/01/13 Monika Comments (0)

Some question I’ve posed this week – right?  Well ever wonder if that could be possible – have a whole new body rather than the one you were born?  The one that you haven’t treated as well as you should or could have?  I’m sure the latter response is a much more possible reason.  But not to worry all is not lost – yet!

You can have the body you want by doing a few strategic things. Here are the tools to Re-Building Your Body:

#1 Believe You Can – I started this newsletter talking about my Vision Board.  If you don’t have a Vision you will not be successful.  You need to believe it’s possible before you ever start out on your journey of re-building and creating the body you desire.  If posting photos of ideal bodies around you works – then do it.  Or perhaps you may want to write about how you will feel, look and dress once you have the body you want. If you connect these various images and thoughts to an emotion, there’s a greater chance that you’ll reach your vision.  Sometimes it may be a matter of just accepting yourself just as you are before you leap to a new you.  Take some time to think about this visioning process – imagine and then take action.

#2 Exercise – I started dancing again and I love it!  I urge you to find something you like to do.  You cannot have optimal health or re-build your body if you don’t move period – it’s that simple. Sitting on the couch watching others exercise or play a sport is just not enough (you knew I’d say that right?).  Why not have some weights near the TV ready for you when you are watching your favorite sit-com.  Or how about investing in a stationary bike – a great way to get some exercise while being entertained at the same time. Time will go by so fast and before you know it you’ve put in 30-60 minutes.

#3 Well Chosen Foods – Portion control, balanced nutrient intake, regularity (both consuming and eliminating) all play a dramatic role in re-building your body. The three major nutrients are  Proteins, Carbohydrates and Fats – you need them all.  And you need Vitamins and Minerals found in whole, real foods as well.  There is often some confusion when it comes to carbohydrates, they do not only consist of the starches which you may commonly associate with the word – like bread, pasta, french fries or doughnuts.  Of course these are the ones you want to minimize and possibly completely eliminate from your diet altogether.  There are 5 categories of carbohydrates: vegetables, fruits, nuts & seed, grains, and beans.  Choose mostly from the first two groups – vegetables and fruits.  They will give you the most bang for your buck. Choose carefully, wisely and healthfully.

#4 Get a Coach – you will not keep yourself accountable, unfortunately, all by yourself.  The most optimistic and brave goal setting is wrought with failure to perform and accomplish without the support of a qualified mentor.  How many times have you planned to get started, but you simply didn’t, and then ended up beating yourself up for not doing what you had your heart set on.  There are kinder, gentler and more productive ways of getting the goal or dream accomplished.  Open up to some expert guidance – you are worth it – aren’t you?  If you don’t feel you are, you will definitely benefit from this re-building tip.

# 5  Find a Friend – can be a furry one, too.  Our adorable furry four legged and feathered friends provide so much opportunity to put stress on hold and maybe eliminate it forever.  Rover helps reduce the negative effect of the stress hormone’s cortisol on our body and mind.  You end up feeling utterly relaxed, calm – pumping up the  Joy Factor something everyone can use a little more of – right?  So walk your dog, pet your cat, give your horse a carrot. It’s all good!

Comments (0)
Categories : Self Improvement, Wellness
Tags : , , , , , ,

Do You Want to be Skinny or Healthy?

03/29/13 Monika Comments (0)

What a loaded question – right?  Is this a tough question for you to answer?  Well, the correct answer is – both. However, I want
to qualify this answer as well – being “skinny” is not necessarily the best thing to be.  And it depends on what “skinny” means to each one of you reading.  Is it: “size minus”, “size comfortable”, “size when I was 16” or “size impossible”? 

Let’s break that down a bit.  Ten years ago I used to speak all over the country and had a talk entitled “Weight Loss – What’s the Mystery?”  My tagline was “When it comes to Weight Loss let your Jeans be YOUR Guide!”  And of course my brand has evolved since then, now it’s called “The Skinny Jeans Weight Loss Program”.  And as you probably know by now the “Skinny” in “Skinny Jeans” is more of a state of mind and an attitude rather than just simply fitting into and wearing the now popular “skinny jeans” style of jeans.

In the Monika world of weight loss “Skinny” means feeling good about yourself which includes having the utmost health and wellbeing possible!  A strong statement and certainly attainable and sustainable.  You must commit to yourself wholeheartedly if you want to have the healthy body, mind and life you want.  You must – it’s the only way.  Too many people fool themselves into believing there’s a quick fix to having the trim body they are seeking – not you – right?  As one of my clients and/or readers by now you certainly know it takes a concerted effort to have the results you want.  Prayer, visualization or meditation is good but you also need to take action to achieve your desired result.  You have to learn how to take control of you life, take action and make your health a priority rather than just fitting into a smaller size.  Whether its baby steps or leaps, you need help – there’s no getting around that.  We all do!

I have seen so many bright, beautiful women cheating themselves into believing they don’t need any help.  You may be thinking you can be more like a man and “do it all by myself”. Here’s a secret – I help men, too.  Many times men have an easier time of taking the weight off on their own simply because they have more muscle than women – but often they struggle as well.  This added advantage of “fat burning” muscle doesn’t necessarily preclude them from needing some coaching. Women on the other hand need additional support wanting to talk things out helps them process their inner feelings – a very real part of a women’s make-up  needing to be honored at all times. You want to feel heard, nurtured, special and connected.  What an absolutely great gift to give to yourself as you get “skinnier” and “healthier” all at the same time!

Be good to yourself as you get closer to your very own “Skinny, Health-ville”!

Comments (0)
Categories : Self Improvement, Skinny Jeans, Wellness
Tags : , , , ,
« Previous Page
Next Page »